The Rise of the Highly Sensitive Man
In this article, I want to explore a unique and deeply personal topic with you—the innate gift of being a highly sensitive person (or HSP). Often misunderstood and overshadowed by societal constructs, high sensitivity is not a weakness. It is a profound strength, especially for us men. The film “Sensitive: The Untold Story” plays a pivotal role in this conversation, highlighting that high sensitivity is neither a disorder nor a condition but a fundamental component of human diversity.
A New Understanding of Sensitivity
Remarkably, over 1.4 billion people, representing 20% of the global population, are highly sensitive, an attribute distributed equally among men and women. This vast number sharply emphasizes the importance of understanding and embracing the highly sensitive. In addition to being an introvert, I have recently recognized and accepted myself as an HSP.
It is also critical to distinguish high sensitivity from introversion, though they may sometimes overlap. Introversion primarily refers to a spectrum of how one chooses to recharge energetically. High sensitivity—also a spectrum—involves a heightened ability to notice, process, and feel the world around us with great depth and intensity.
The Four Key Characteristics of High Sensitivity
The traits of highly sensitive people can be summarized by the acronym DOES:
Depth of processing: HSPs engage in complex thought processes and reflections.
Overstimulation: They may become easily overwhelmed by high levels of stimuli.
Empathy and Emotional responsiveness: Their emotional experience is intense, and they have a strong capacity for empathy.
Sensitivity to Subtleties: They are acutely aware of nuances in their environment that others might overlook.
Understanding these characteristics is essential for acknowledging the true nature of the highly sensitive. It is a deeper, more intense engagement with the world.
The Reality of Highly Sensitive Men
High sensitivity is a term that emerged from the work of psychologists who identified a distinct trait characterized by deeper cognitive processing of sensory input, a higher emotional response, and a greater sensitivity to environmental stimuli. For highly sensitive men, everyday experiences can be more absorbing, from the emotional weight of a movie to the stress of a crowded room.
But this sensitivity does not fit neatly into the conventional molds of masculinity. Many highly sensitive men have felt the need to hide their true selves, fearing judgment or misunderstanding. They have grown up in a culture that idolizes stoicism and undervalues emotional expressiveness in men. They are rarely, if ever, gracious in allowing themselves space to be completely vulnerable, fearing the misperception of weakness.
Sensitivity: A Superpower
Yes, you read that right—a superpower. The narrative is shifting, and the strength inherent in sensitivity is slowly gaining recognition. Sensitivity allows for a greater capacity for empathy, making highly sensitive men compassionate friends, partners, and fathers.
Our sensitivity empowers us with empathy, creativity, and intuition, qualities that embolden us as natural leaders and pioneers. We can see beneath the surface, innovate, lead with heart, and identify solutions and insights that elude others.
How to Thrive as a Highly Sensitive Man
Thriving with high sensitivity is an art and a commitment to oneself. Here’s how we can cultivate and protect our superpower:
Know and Respect Your Limits: Recognizing what overwhelms us is vital to caring for ourselves.
Self-Care Is Non-Negotiable: Prioritizing activities that replenish our energy is crucial. Whether it’s a quiet walk in nature or a creative pursuit, find what fills your cup.
Boundaries Are Your Best Friend: Saying no and setting personal boundaries with others protect our energy and emotional well-being.
Find and Create Your Tribe: Surround yourself with those who understand and support your sensitivity. There’s strength and comfort in shared experiences.
Embrace Your Strengths: Our deep processing, empathy, and attention to detail are tools that can guide us to fulfilling and impactful lives.
A Personal Journey
Depression is REAL. Over the years, I have experienced several bouts of depression—even recently. As a coach and a creative, I know that the world can often seem very cold and very lonely. Through it all, learning about being a highly sensitive person has been a Godsend. Even amidst depression, I have learned not to write off or diminish my emotions. Instead, I lean into them and find peace within the storm clouds looming above my head. Doing so ultimately ignites my creativity, harnessing my high sensitivity as fuel to the flame. Thus, I now view my sensitivity as a gift.
Closing Thoughts
The worldview around sensitive men is evolving. Books, discussions, and awareness are paving the way for a broader understanding and even a reimagining of what it means to be a man. Sensitivity is recognized as a societal asset that encourages emotional intelligence and fosters genuine connections.
Being a highly sensitive man is a journey of self-discovery, resilience, and empowerment. By embracing our nature, we challenge outdated norms and lead by example. We prove that strength comes in many forms, including the courage to be vulnerable and empathetic.
Consider this an invitation to see the world and ourselves in a different light. Viewing sensitivity as a superpower rather than a flaw to overcome allows us to lead, love, and live with significant impact. Together, let’s continue to navigate the path of sensitivity with courage, understanding, and an open heart. Remember, your sensitivity is a gift to the world.
Warmly,
Freddy
Frederick C. Sanders, Ph.D., MCC
The Freedom Architect™
https://fcsanders.com
P.S.—Please share and forward this to someone who may find this insight valuable.
